For Better or For Worse

Those words are the single biggest reason why I don't typically encourage the writing of your own vows. For better or for worse are a very important part of the promise you are making when you get married. You need to make the vow to love them unconditionally, for better or for worse, or your marriage doesn't mean as much. As soon as you say, "I do," you have agreed to those terms of service.

If you and your husband or wife are in a fight, no matter whose "fault" it is, you agreed that you would love them, for better or for worse. Even if you think it is their "fault" for whatever reason, you promised you would love them through the hardest of times, so you should be showing them love and compassion through the bad times, not anger and hatred. When you get married, you are supposed to go into it with the intention of NEVER trying to change them... Including if they change on their own and you want the old version back!

If there is a problem, fix it! Don't ever try to make them better, though. Trying to tell someone everything they do wrong will only cause resentment. Instead, better yourself. We ALL have room for improvement, so find ways that YOU can be a better spouse. You might just find that the problems you were finding in your relationship seem to disappear when you start working on yourself and how you treat your relationships with everyone.

I've come across so many people in my life who say that they would divorce their husband or wife if they were ever cheated on... Maybe it's just me, but I don't recall my priest saying, "For better or worse, except if..." No, I don't support ANYONE cheating on someone in a relationship, but if you're married you already made the promise to stay with them. You must keep in mind that no one just falls out of love. If they go off and cheat, there is a void that they are looking to be filled. It is your job as a spouse to keep that void filled with YOUR love and YOUR compassion and YOUR sympathy. The people who never stop trying to be better are probably a lot less likely to ever be divorced.

No matter what, never stop loving your spouse.